♥ 璇 ♥

ღ Tuesday, April 3, 2012

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

hi everybody! for so long i didnt update my blog! hahhahaha!

I've been very busy with stuff, and now im free! Yeah!

party time! <3

♥ You're Lurving me @

10:27 AM

ღ Monday, January 16, 2012

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

the sad feelings still not gone. why am i so unhappy all the times? cheering up by myself nv works.

moody... moody... moody... life is making me very tired. very very...

is there a special place i can go to?

♥ You're Lurving me @

6:38 AM

ღ Thursday, October 6, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

after 2 wks break, finally returning to sch tmr.

pop~ pop~ gracias~

ok, i dun think everyone understand what im trying to say bt.... its brown eyed girls new song! hahahaha anyway......

im gg shopping again soon! hahahahahhahahahhaha im lifting my own moods up again!

once i think of shopping, korean, biology makes me high!

shld be able to enjoy sch tmr, and off to prepare for my bdae celebrations for my 21st! in march next yr.

Mr boogie~ if i want u, i can have u....... by f(x)
Mr simple ..... by super junior
Mr taxi by snsd hahahahhah

♥ You're Lurving me @

8:18 AM

ღ Friday, September 30, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

flirting can help u get a BF?

Bullshit.

i've tried so many times.

Eh, i tell u. ive done a survey on myself. not bragging bt most people gave me comments like im crazy, im friendly, im helpful and some say im cute. i srsly think whether they bluffed me. Bcos im still single. IM NOT FUCKING DESPERATE. I JUST THINK THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME. I SUCCEED IN EVERYTHING. FRIENDS, STUDY, GAMES, BUT NOT LOVE.

I nv succeed in that.

Im starting to hate myself. from now, i keep thinking i look ugly and im weird and im stupid. u guys are not in my shoes so u dun know how i feel. ever since i started uni, nth is gg right.

my first assignment is done badly, and i haven even finish studying for my exams, all i do is sleep. people are partying away. i lock myself in my room and cry.

why am i born so fucking ugly?

why am i so fucking unlucky?

when am i born so fucking stupid?

down fucking period of my life.

i appear so bubbly and happy in front of ppl, bt actually its raining inside my heart. no one seems to know. i told my mum abt this prob, she says im dumb and stupid. My sis asked me to close my fb down bcos its disgusting. my dad simply dun care.

yeah, i admit im UGLY, i have a BAD PERSONALITY AND IM INFERIOR IN ALL WAYS. I KNOW I NEED TO GET RID OF MYSELF AND INCINERATE MYSELF.

FLIRT? i've tried. I've smiled, im friendly, i dress up. But i never succeed. I've given up on love. TOTALLY.

tts right boys, dun approach me. cos im ugly to a point that the swimming pool will run away if i jump in. so let me rot. rot. rot. rot. rot.

tts right, dun approach me.

good, cute guys all attached, or else they dun even look at you. Yeah, and their gfs are very ugly.

im 20 this yr, 21 nx yr so i hope i can get this special some1 to celebrate my bdae wit me on my bdae party. all my frens gt one. why havent I? lonely bdae. i think maybe i shall "close down" my idea of having a 21st bdae celebration.

u guys dun know the definition of lonely. oh, no. maybe u know. u know the theory part, bt u dun know the practical part of it.

everytime i make a card for some1 or any1, they dun rly seem interested or happy bcos they received my handmade card. whow. i shall stop making it for my frens.

FUCK life.

FUCK everything i have.

FUCK LOVE. I WILL NEVER MEET ONE.

FUCK ME AND JUST DIE.

FUCK IT. Just take it tt my dentist or some other guys nv existed in my life.

tts the way. follow this emoticon and fuck life.

♥ You're Lurving me @

8:06 AM

ღ Tuesday, September 13, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

ok, its time for me to make a confession.

ok i admit defeat. i admit i like the dentist. the younger one.

he is like the ideal husband and all, gentle and he has what all girls want.

but do i have a chance?

I've NEVER liked any1 in my life before, tts y im always single. but i duno why i have feelings for him. hmm...

i srsly hope he doesnt see this post, bcos im gona be very embarrassed if he does.

♥ You're Lurving me @

8:29 AM

ღ Sunday, September 11, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

Am i normal or wat?

20 gg on to 21 and no BF yet. hmm...

Im wondering there's something wrong with me....

always thought tt my orthodontist is a great choice, but i think he has a gf n dun rly seem interested in meh...

All i want to say is, im single and available!

♥ You're Lurving me @

9:58 AM

ღ Wednesday, September 7, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

I am not human.

why am i always so unlucky?

this is the 10th time of the year i've been so unlucky and unhappy.

can you guys believe it? starting from gastroenteritis, i had to eat charcoal med and i vomited so many many times, and serious diarrhea to a point that i almost died from dehydration.

then it stopped. dizziness and low blood pressure came. i lost a total of 5 kg in this period.

then one week ltr, i had to go for a day surgery to get my impacted tooth out. after that, the wound became very painful and yet i have to endure it-- AWAKE in the op room.

after the op i had to take a course of antibiotics. the antibiotics had serious side effects, my acne is leaving scars on my skin, and i suffered from yeast infections.

then a period ago, i was scraping my tongue and the tongue scrapper flew to my eye, and cut my eye. now i have to live on eye drops and couldn't wear my contact lenses.my eyeball is still painful.

and can u believe it? i shall tell you something tt happened last mth at ndc.

never judge a book by its cover.

i went back to place the metal ring ard my teeth, and he told me, if u feel pain or watever, just tell me.

so i rly did feel pain, and i told him i feel a bit painful. you know what he said?

"huh? this is painful? this is the least painful in the whole of braces treatment. i tot ur quite brave one, u went for op awake leh."

he was the one who told me to tell him if i feel uncomfortable, and now that i told him, he scolded me. wow and he said "NO NEED GO A AND E LA."

then i was curious and asked him about my wisdom tooth and thickness of the braces. you know wat he said, huh dun need to pluck out, u have to believe me, I AM UR DOCTOR.

the glue he put into my mouth had a sour taste, and so i asked him wats tt. he said: "wun die from eating it one. then he gave me wax and he added "WUN DIE ONE LA."
wow.

no matter where i go what i do, there would be people hating and scolding me. i only asked him bcos im curious. then he scold me.

he is one off my doctors whom i tink is very very gentle, very good, very patient, and very good husband material. (doesnt mean i want him to be mine) he is so so so gd that i always look 4ward to gg to dentist. now i dun.

and in terms of studies, i still couldnt find any frens as crazy as sandy, and i couldnt make it into ntu.

i might as well die.

i love biology MORE THAN MY LIFE. even in my hardest time in RP, i never even had the thought of giving up my interest, now, i even feel like stopping sch.

i feel like giving up my own life. i am still gathering courage to kill myself.

that is the health part. now the relationship part.

why is it every time i like someone, the person doesn't like me back?

well, i'll never get married, and i feel lonely. my pillow nowadays are too wet for me to sleep.

♥ You're Lurving me @

5:45 AM

ღ

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

I tink i shld die. i srsly shld.

am i wanted in this world?

dun think so.

i shld try to die tmr.

i shld go to a beach.

This shld be the last time ur seeing me.

signing off-
Reggie

♥ You're Lurving me @

3:38 AM

ღ Saturday, July 23, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

hi guys.

I'm still suffering from the aftermath of my surgery.

so bored at home, no dates and no nth, so just sleep lor.

my teeth's bone like still weird weird one, still biting from one side and then still got one big hole on the other extraction site.

starting sch soon, bt i doubt it would be fun. Rested for 8 mths, now becoming lazy.

oh ya, my stitches were taken out last week. I have to tell u something that i was so embarassed abt.

this was wat happened last week.

My hp alarm rang, and i woke up early in the morning, anticipating to go to NDC again -.-

That day was officially known as taking out stitches day, claimed by my mum.

we took a bus again, from my hse right to outram park's interchange.

Then i was making up on the bus, checking whether my makeup is smudged and put on my pinkest lipsticky.

Then the day before tt, i charged my camera to the fullest and took it with my on the bus and hugged it tightly.

I was testing my cam's fxn and did multiple snapshots on the bus. (testing first ma!)

And finally we reached NDC, and then we registered.

Weird leh, the number should be "X" instead of "Y". (sorry guys, i cnt tell u my dentist's rm number if not ppl would go bash him up cos im so smitten by him).

I felt weird. Guys, u know the feeling of having a stone big as ocean on ur chest, and then u have to put it down and it sinks all the way to the gates of hell?

The room number was not what i wanted, it was another surgeon. (he asked me abt med hx, he asked me how to spell scoliosis! Eh excuse me, u doctor or i doctor huh? or shld u be consulting me instead? idiot fool, charged me so exp for taking out stitches, and it was painful when he forgot and poked my gums with his sharp tweezers. i suddenly feel very exp bcos everytime i go checkup with my another doc, he gave me free checkup"S" hor, so suddenly i feel the pinch in my heart, AND OF COURSE MY WALLET.)

I sighed loudly in front of him. And he kept persuading me to sit down, so i sat lor. sian.

Though my body was at "Y", my heart flew to Dr yg's room. Then my mum kept getting up from her seat, and tried to call Dr yg, cos i wanted to take pic with him.

then one nurse inside the room keep looking at us, cos me and my mum like crazy bitches kept looking outside. haha, looking at Dr yg la!

finally stitches were taken out, i ran outta the room to find him! (eh guys, i was wondering y removing stitches were not done by my operating surgeon.)

so we went to ask him, heng ah, he was quite free! then when he saw us he was like, hey!!!!!!!!!
like very happy. { in reggie's heart: "haha, i oso very happy when i see you, my heart just glowed :) }

Bt things tt r nt good abt him, is tt he has stml and he's short and old. -.- bt i gotta admit, his face is really
really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really adorable! when u see him, u will feel like he's a sweetheart to you, or put it simple, a dearie.

his lips were rly red, and at first i tot he applied lipstick! Then he got rabbit teeth in front, and rly makes u feel like u wanna pinch his cheeks when he smiles. a plushy feeling that is.

the first time i met him, it seems like there is some kind of love arrow that stabbed right into my mum and my heart! damn handsome sia. cos the first time i met him, he was facing the other side typing comp, when he turned ard, i almost fainted.

back to the embarrassing moments... And then he asked me back, how come my comp didnt have ur name appeared when u registered? how come ah? i shld be the one taking out stitches for you leh. so cute right? kept acting cute in front of me... 37 yrs old still can act cute and be cute hahahahaha.

and then my mum said something that made me blush all the way home.

she became a smart aleck for one second and went straight to tell Dr yg: " hey can u take a pic with my daughter? she thinks ur cute!"

OMG, why the hell did my mum do that for? urgh.. he was typing on his comp and suddenly went hohohohohoho! he laughed so loud!

omg, i was like, why u go tell him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and when he turned ard, he was still smiling and then he say, nv mind, i can check ur teeth for u again even though u have taken out ur stitches!

haha i damn happy sia.

then like tt lor.

he didnt charge me a single cent. lol

i always get free checkups! now, by two diff docs!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

bt anw, he didnt agree to take a pic with me cos he has to rush for another surgery. bt he put his hands on my shoulders and told me he promise to take one with me when he sees me ard, or when he is free. hahaha he promised me leh hehehehehehehe so busy still can take time off to check teeth for me. and tt time if u guys rmb, he took time off his busy schedule and operated for me.

haix too bad, he is old enuf to be my father.

I don't love him or like him to be my valentine. i like him in a way that erm... as in i admire him for his experience, and fangirling over his cute face and also thankful for his gentleness and patience while doing surgery for me.

dun get mistaken guys, i dun love him as a lover u get it??!??!?!

bt now, due to my countless visits to NDC, i made two frens. u guys shld know who they r.

♥ You're Lurving me @

10:12 PM

ღ Tuesday, July 5, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

Hey guys! I finally can put on my braces!

Let me tell you my experience at NDC!

I can tell you guys, if you need dental treatments, NDC is the place to go, despite the wrong teeth that they extracted out.

My surgery was in the afternoon at 2pm, then I took a bus from my house right to NDC. I panicked all the way for the whole trip, I wondered what would happen during my surgery.

He told me i would hear very loud drilling noises, that didn't scare me, what scared me was the pain that i will feel.

My body is so weak to a ptn where it is not suitable for general anesthesia, and so i opted for local anesthesia. a few days before they called me, they say dr yong was on course and couldnt operate for me! i scolded the nurse and demanded i want him! the nurse laughed and said she would ask the doc for me.

finally she gave me a date for LA, by the same doc.

And so, i went up to 3rd floor, and then when i was signing the medisave form, my doc came in thru the door! hahaha i didnt see him, my mum was excited and kept asking me to see him!

after that we went to a room and then the doc came out, and asked me and i told him i went to a and e a few days ago. he like.... pitied me and was damn gentle to me!

Then a nurse pulled me as i walked reluctantly in, the nurse teased me and told everybody that i was like her daughter becos she was literally pulling me into the operating theater!

the person told me the doc is very gentle and pro. :)

Then she brought me in to the room gt lots of needles and drill and scalpel and i am not scared of those at all. the nurse kept holding on to my hand and consoling me and they were so frenly i wasnt rly scared! but when the doc took out the needle, he told me that was be the most painful part of the whole surgery, and so i stared at the needle, it was big, and then i told him i was gg to cry! when he heard tt he panicked and was like... ok relax, a prick only. at first the nurse told me was 4 injections, in the end he said I was not numbed enuf, he scared tt i may feel pain afterwards, so he added 4 more became 8 -.-

the injections were done on my inner lips, gums and one very near the throat.

AHAHA! i am gonna slap those who told me that injections are painful and unbearable. they were no pain at all!!!! cos the dental surgeon handsome ma, so i kept staring at him till i forgot. hahahaha

then the first thing was to wait for the anesthesia to numb the area. And he kept cfming with the nurse my ic and which teeth to take out. they scared they make another mistake haha.

waited and waited, nurse asked me question and then i answered and then...

surgery lights on! then they covered my eyes, i told them i want to see but they say the lights were too bright and so no choice bt cover my eyes. im not scared of the drills i ma gonna see ltr, bt if they covered my eyes, i cannot see the surgeon!!!!!!

then he stood on my right, cos my eyes were covered, he tapped my shoulder like im his friend like tt, and told me he would be standing on my right side.

so sweet!

haha, though my eyes were covered, i kept looking at the right, i see nth bt shadow of him -.-

then it started.

he took out a plier to pluck out my pre molar, he didnt shake the tooth, he just pulled and everything came out. whoo! one tooth done!

the other tooth was more diff. my left pre molar was embedded inside my gums so have to cut my gums and drill the bone! sounds scary? but no i love it!

i can assure you will feel nth but pressure.

cos the tooth damn hard to take out, i can hear him breathing very restlessly haha handsome leh.

I knew he was cutting my gums open, and then he kept digging my tooth, then he knock and then use drill, my head vibrated.

And then it came out lor, during this, i kept holding on to the nurse hands! the doc saw when he finished the surgery, he said can let go liao, cos he stitching nw. everything done!

then i see a bit of him stitching me like sewing clothes lor. haha i feel nth!

hahahahaha everything done in 30 mins!

bt a lot of bleeding lor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Haha they kept praising me for being so gd in the OT. cos normally ppl would freak out and scream, im proud of myself i didnt do any of that! im born to be a anesthesiologist! Im no scared of needles!

then they brought me to a chair and i rested and then he came to see me! haha and then erm, he said everything is ok and i was discharged!

done!

next next wk is my braces!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

finally!!!!!!

congrats me!!!!!!!!!!!

and finally, i want to thank the staff that attended to me ytd and also the doc who took time off his busy schedule and operated for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks, Dr yong!

Oh ya, next wk gg to take out stitch, i want to take pic with him! ytd didnt take cos he too busy -.-

* gentle and cute guys are so hard to come by, bt i met one ytd!

♥ You're Lurving me @

5:43 AM

ღ Friday, June 10, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

I've been pondering on the things im missing in life.

I have clothes, accessories, love in family and everything other ppl have.

but why do i still have that feeling of being lonely?

Im in a room with lots of ppl, im still lonely.

Ur lonely even though u are tgt with ppl you know, bcos they arent the right ppl u need.

after many thoughts, i finally found wat im missing in life.

My true love.

Can anybody protect me and shield me from the rigors of this demanding world?

♥ You're Lurving me @

8:17 AM

ღ Thursday, June 9, 2011

♥ Love Dai Yang tian ! ♥

I am really rotting in the principles of half life...

srsly...

My frens are all either gg to ns or leaving spore to pursue further studies, and me? waiting for that damn wisdom tooth surgery and now i cant even work and have no money and rotting at home.

like srsly nth to do and i am now living off ppl's money to tide me over this tough and boring period. I srsly keep travelling up to ndc so many times till i scared alrdy.

haix... i wish someone can like follow me go swimming, or ask me out to sing, or do something fun pls. Anyone, anyone pls. I am rly rotting.....

i can do anything, as long as i dun stay at home. During my poly times, i wished for more hols and long breaks. Now i am scared of breaks and rly hope to go to sch again. Sch work can keep me busy...

I have no bf, and so no one to acc me. haix.

sian lor me, have to slp and then wake up then eat then slp again.

Heng i gg for braces in a couple of months, at least i have a chance to slim dwn, i will ask the dentist to tighten as tight as possible to refrain me from eating haha. i doubt he will do that. anw...

i hope i can slim dwn when put on braces, but i have a feeling its impossible bcos erm... i can still eat so many things even when im sick, so even if im on braces, i dun think i can reduce any weight? nvm, i hope the braces are rly tight....

oh, have i told u the time in sec sch, i bit the dentist real hard on the hand while she was doing my fillings. she scolded me idiot fool. but i rly did leave bite marks on her hands despite wearing gloves...

so i hope i dun leave any scratch marks on my dentist hands this time...

i wouldnt want to also becos i.... nvm

anw... pls... someone, anyone, pls make me go out... urgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

♥ You're Lurving me @

5:46 AM